Midas was a lucky man. I too have superpowers. Everything I touch turns to *BLEEP*.
I know I've said it before, but I run into things all. the. time. In the last week alone, I've knocked children over, broken my favorite porcelain sugar spoon, snapped the head off a doll (on accident, not in some psycho fit of rage, I swear), spilled coffee on my favorite coffee table book, ruined my favorite jeans sledding down a hill (somehow ripping a huge hole in the crotch), and burned a hole in Terry's favorite pair of shoes. The last one happened with such good intentions too. After our day of sledding, I placed the family's wet shoes behind the fireplace screen to dry out. Terry's shoes being the biggest, were the only ones that had holes burned right through the toes. Whoops.
(Terry was such a good sport about it too. He only made me feel a teensy bit stupid.)
But to top off the week's suck, I made the worst mistake of all: I never read Fiona's class email. (The one with instructions for Valentine's Day.)
Apparently, all week, the parents of kids in her class were making homemade valentines for their children, secretly giving them to the teachers at drop-off, and were read aloud by the teachers at circle time. Sweet, right?
Thursday rolled around and Fiona waited for her name to be called, just as all of her friends had. It never happened because Mommy doesn't read emails in her spam folder.
Later that day, Fiona's sweet teacher, Ms. Lori, walked down the hall to my classroom, holding a heart-decorated piece of paper in hand.
Ms. Lori: "I don't know if you got the memo, but we are reading the kids' valentines that you were supposed to write to your child in front of the class. Fiona got sick of waiting, so she made herself one. From you." (Sad pat on the back.)
∞ FIONA'S HOMEMADE VALENTINE ∞
"FIONA (hearts next to her name)
LOVE FOR FIONA
(open it up)
DEAR FIONA, WHEN YOU CAME OUT OF ME YOU LOOKED LIKE A PRINCESS AND YOU STILL LOOK LIKE A PRINCESS AND I LOVE YOU LOVE NEVE AND DERA AND TERRY. (drawing of a crown and flowers)"
I got crap for the rest of the day from her teachers for the "princess thing" (we are sooo not princessy here), but I was too distracted by how awful I felt that the poor kid had to write her own valentine to care about anything else.
So, Terry and I made sure that we had her valentine ready for Friday. It wasn't easy finding a skywriter to write "WHEN YOU CAME OUT OF ME YOU LOOKED LIKE A PRINCESS" over the playground at the last minute, but where there's a will there's a way.
(Valentine flowers from Terry, complete with empty Scotch bottle/vase. Resourceful and romantic, no?)
6 comments:
Now she has a memory and a story to torture you with for the rest of your life. That's the real gift.
Bob's self-penned Valentine would have to read,"... when you came out of me... you had peed and pooed before you made your exit and that was a cause of great concern so there was a lot of vacuuming involved of my insides and you had a widow's peak hairline and a weird face rash so you looked like Eddie Munster with acne..."
Happy Valentine's Day!
trust that she did not look like a princess upon entry. she did share a likeness to gollum from lord of the rings though.
me thinks the fireplace screen is in the attic (or maybe Goodwill) and I'm guessing Terry's shoes were too close to the FLAMES?? Hmmm....
ML
PS - do my emails go into the spam folder? :-)
let me guess....his chukka boots
She made herself a valentine. She just became my hero.
Great story and photo!
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